Reflections...

I'm taking a train to London, then, on Saturday morning, I'm flying home. It's been 130 days since I got on a plane and found myself in England, nervous but excited to see a new place and absorb the culture. That day, I met Eugen, my crazy Romanian flatmate, who introduced me to the group of people that I would spend the next four months with. But, here we are, it's the last day. I'm not sure how to feel about it. I'm definitely excited to go back home and enjoy the superior weather, free food, and the company of my family and HBoO, but I have this really sick feeling about returning to America and having my group of friends, the best friends I've ever had, being three thousand miles away. It's a difficult situation to face, an emotional roller coaster with exciting highs and depressing lows. One minute, I can't wait to eat my mom's food, sleep in my own bed, and give HBoO the hugs she deserves, the next, I'm practically in tears knowing that I'll never be lounging in Flower's room air drumming to Rush and playing Civilization III until 6 AM ever again. I don't know how to feel...

The rest of this entry is dedicated to my friends who, unfortunately, I won't see for a long time (in alphabetical order)...
Amy: Fellow history student, one of the nicest people I know, and the butt of every racist joke that Flower, Oliver, and I can muster (Sorry!). As Mark always says, you WILL make a great mother one day, what with all the life advice, back massages, and stern talkings to that we get. I'll miss the face you always make when we suggest that you date Mark..:-)
Eugen: You crazy foreigner! Seriously, though, you are the most skilled person I know. If I ever need something assembled, cooked, or customized, I know exactly who to turn to. From the stuffed peppers to the cool lights in Flower's room, you have provided our group with all of the amazing gadgets, stenciled shirts, and delicious food that we could ever ask for. Whatever you end up doing, I'm certain you'll be great at it..:-)
Flower: Where do I even begin? From the music to the guitaring to the sarcasm to the video games, we have nearly the same taste in everything. We've been through hell and back together, from sleeping in subways during blizzards to confronting your parents about drugs, university, and life, we've been through it all. I know you'll figure your shit out, I'll always be there to help..:-)
Joe: There are too many cool things to narrow it down to a paragraph, so I'll just say the first things that come to mind. You are a sensible guy who knows what he wants. You are genuine, honest, and really really cool. Also, you have impeccable comedic timing. Remember when you had liquid in your knee and were absent for a few days? Punchlines ceased to exist during that time, only to be replaced with "I miss Joe!"..:-)

Layla: It's a shame you could only come up on the weekends, we missed you during the week. You and Flower are the perfect couple (awww), keep it up, because he really likes you. Enjoy Northumbria next year, and make sure to keep me updated on the group situation. You're my eyes and ears while I'm away..:-)
Mark: Marcus, Marcus, Marcus..what do I say? A social networking genius, currently with 706 Facebook friends. I've never met a nicer person. You are an integral part of our group, providing nonstop entertainment in the form of stories, drunken shananagins, and other Larry David type behaviours. I'll always remember, THIS. IS. SPARTA!!!!
Oliver: You sexy sexy bastard. You truly are a man beyond words. One of the few people on earth who is more offensive than I am, I don't know how you do it. One thing's for certain, you, Flower, and me in a room spells trouble for anybody within fifty miles..:-)
Zoe: Hiya! Are you alright? Upbeat, cheerful, and always regretting the night before, you are an awesome friend. I'm happy for you and Eugen, I hope everything keeps on as well as it is. Hanging out with you was a real treat..:-)

There's more, of course, but I lack pictorial evidence at the moment. To Stu, Cheskah, and Jordan, you guys are awesome as well. I wish we could have hung out more. All the parties were tons of fun, and I hope to hear from you in the coming months. Have fun, and stay smart..:-)

Well, there you have it, a tribute to my friends. I love you guys, it won't be the same without you..:-)

-Matt

Together in London...

Apology: Sorry, sorry, sorry. I meant to post this entry days ago, but there was some confusion with transferring pictures between my hard drive and my friend's computer. I now have the pictures, so, without further ado, I present our trip to London..:-)


HBoO thought it would be a great idea to stay up all night on Wednesday because we had to catch an early flight to London. I was fine with this because of my history with insomnia, but HBoO passed out sometime after 5 AM. Having forgotten to drink any water the day before, HBoO woke with a hangover of death. Luckily I was able to muster the strength to get our stuff together and get to the airport on time. When we arrived, obtaining tickets and eating a Boots meal deal went off without a hitch, but airport security decided to throw us a curve...

I approached the conveyor belt and handed the guy my jacket, bag and shoes. He told me to walk through the security laser thing, forgetting to tell me to empty my pockets. Lots of beeping happened, then I was patted down and practically stripped and prodded with phallic objects and JESUS CHRIST I WANT TO GO HOME MOMMY!!!!

Then we flew on a plane and landed in Heathrow. Getting to our hotel was easy, coping with the sheer epicosity and opulence was difficult. Just a month ago, I had danced with joy when encountering a bathtub. Now, I was staring at this...
We spent hours trying to figure out how to describe how awesome that bed was. We came up with "oppressively comfortable". I literally felt crushed and helpless under the sheer wonder of the bedsheets. We thought about renting a movie, but it cost 7.50 for a single viewing (roughly $15). Yeah, no...

After reaffirming that we could use HBoO's mom's credit card for a few things, we took advantage and had dinner downstairs and ordered a bottle of wine afterwards. It was quite romantic...
For those that don't know (most of you), this trip marked HBoO and my one year anniversary as a couple. Most of our time was spent reminiscing about all the cool stuff that we've done over the past twelve months. It was a pretty awesome year...

The next day, we got up early and went into the city center. Our first stop was Fleet Street, home of the infamous Sweeney Todd. We couldn't help but sing snippets from the musical, most notably belting out, "Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd. He served a DARK and a VENGEFUL god! What happens then well that's the play and he wouldn't want us to give it away..."

Yeah, we're dorks. We even found 186 Fleet Street, the building that Sweeney supposedly lived in...
It doesn't get much creepier than that...

Our next stop was Trafalgar Square and the National Gallery. We took a look at the impressionist section (HBoO and I love to run away from a paintings then run up close), then spent some time trying and failing to climb all over the monument in the middle of the square. It was good fun...
Next, we headed down the street to see the houses of Parliament, Big Ben, and Westminster Abbey. These places were packed to the brim with tourists from all over the world, all screaming in their native tongues and jumping out into the street to avoid stampeding herds of young students. It was quite a sight...
The Abbey was closed, but we found a back entrance that went into the catacombs and the cloister where all the monks live. We had to sneak around a bit to avoid authoritative members of the clergy, but it was totally worth it for this...
At this point, we were getting hungry, so we walked back to Fleet Street to eat in the world's creepiest tavern...
This was HBoO's last sit down meal in England. In the few days that we spent together, I got her to eat a full English breakfast, fish and chips, steak pie, Gregg's, and a Boot's meal deal. Eating doesn't get much more British than that. After navigating our way back through the city to our hotel, we stayed up all night talking about how old we felt. There we were in a foreign city alone together paying for our own meals and utilizing public transportation on our own, staying in a hotel without parents, and planning our own vacation itinerary. Kids just don't do that...

So, HBoO had an awesome time in England (I think). We saw a huge number of landmarks in three different cities spanning the entirety of England, sipped wine in a four star hotel, ate traditional English food, and flew on a plane together. It was one of the best experiences I've had so far on this trip, and I got to share it with the girl that I love. Life doesn't get much better..:-)

-Matt

If you want to read more about this trip, HBoO is writing a series of vignettes about the experience. You can find them here.

She came to Newcastle...

I realize now that I never mentioned that HBoO was coming to Newcastle to visit me. Well, she did come, and her experience was (hopefully) awesome. The whole time I've been gone, her and I have been keeping a constant connection via Skype, which has worked out pretty well, but then she got the bright idea to ask her parents if they would fund a trip to England for Matt visitation rights. Against all odds, they said yes. Not only that, but they also set us up in a 4 star Marriott Hotel in London for two nights. Best. Birthday present. EVAR..!!!

I learned of the good news via text message while I was gallivanting in Europe. Since then, we'd been diligently planning HBoO's imminent arrival. I got all dressed up and acquired some flowers and a cake (by request). She showed up at Newcastle airport Sunday night, where we remained attached for about half an hour. I'll skip a description of the mushy hugging and kissing part and just leave you with this video. Warning: GHEEYYYY!!!!! (but a good approximation)...

Then, I introduced her to all of my friends sporadically, starting with Flower and then branching out to the whole group. Everybody liked each other, so that was a success, but a few unfortunate events nearly ruined the Newcastle experience. Remember chavs? Well, after a brief mission to Flower's friend's house, the three of us were accosted by a drugged up chav couple. SCARY. AS. FUCK!!!

Luckily, they had combined some ecstasy pills with the usual copious amounts of alcohol, so they ended up being harmless, but it was annoying and stressful to be followed back to Knoll Court by scary drunk chavs who insisted on thinking that HBoO was Chinese even after we told them she was Filipino. Crisis narrowly averted...

The next day, our plan was to visit The Baltic, but all of the exhibits were being reworked, so we had to find an alternate means of entertainment. We ended up walking around the Quayside for a few hours, enjoying the beauty of the city center and the Tyne. Having run out of Newcastle ideas, we decided the best course of action was to spontaneously take a train to York and spend the day frolicking in England's quaintest city. Lots of sightseeing led HBoO to describe York with the following statement:

"Holy shit, Matt, this place is like DISNEY WORLD!!!"

to which I responded:

"Yeah, except these are REAL 13th century ruins, whereas Disney World's attractions are mostly made of plastic..:-P"

*smack!*

I then proceeded to photograph a whole bunch of random stuff (mostly York Minster)...

All in all, taking HBoO to York was the best idea ever. It's easily my favorite place in England, what with all of the picturesque landmarks, cobbled streets, and authentic pubs. Oh yeah, here's a bonus...
Anyone that knows HBoO knows that what followed this scene was a wonderfully choreographed booty shaking to "My Humps" and the milkshake song. Hilarity ensued...

Next will be the London leg of the trip..:-)

-Matt

Jesus CHRIST, the people I attract...

MELSISA MKALJERSD:FAJEW

Crazy European Adventure Part 11: The Big Finale...

We train hopped to Calais, relieved to not have to be kicked off anymore public transport. Telling the "we lost our tickets" lie was becoming exhaustive, especially since I did most of the lying and answering questions. But, now we had arrived at our final destination, the port town of Calais. There was only one problem, where the hell is the town? Our view from the train station was this...
Hmm...

We started hiking down the road, looking for a sign pointing to Calais. We had 24 hours to kill before our ferry left, so this was a great way to occupy our time and see rural France...
Eventually, we saw a town in the distance. We knew the road led to a highway, so we took a detour across a few fields...
After walking for a couple of miles, we came upon a patch of forest with a path leading into it. Still of the mindset that we had hours to kill, we decided to explore a bit...
"That's a nice forest," we thought as we walked along the path. Then, we found what looked like an abandoned shack. A place to sleep for the night,perhaps..?
Perhaps not. The shotgun shells and broken beer bottles strewn about the place were tell-tale signs. Also, we saw a brand new video camera and a perfectly made bed through the window. I am %100 sure a serial killer used this place for his victims. We left immediately...

After another hour of walking, we reached Calais. Our plan was to find the beach and sleep in one of the beach huts. For some reason, probably exhaustion, we took the most roundabout way to the beach possible. It took something like four hours to get through the town and we were unhappy about it. Calais is a dump. Broken glass, chavs, and shabby buildings probably constructed in the 1970s were all it had to offer. I learned something on this trip. Port towns SUCK..!

But, finally, we made it to the beach...
We found a beach hut that had been ransacked and decided to fix it up so that we could sleep there for free. It was a two hour project...
Eventually, we gave up. A word of advice. If your floor is covered in sand, it's less work to find a new place to stay rather than clean it up. This is the best we could do...
Home sweet home. Notice the makeshift door. That was an attempt to keep the cold out because, by now, the sun was setting...
Suddenly, the temperature dropped to "Fuck-it's-cold-and-I-can't-feel-my-fingers". Flower and I started collecting wood for a fire. Simon..um...
...Put fishing nets and things made of plastic and metal on top. The smoke was unbearable and sent me into a coughing fit that completely obliterated my voice box for the next week. I was unable to speak for several days afterwards. Also, this was when I developed conjunctivitis in both eyes...

At midnight, we were fed up and decided to hike to the ferry port to see if we could catch an earlier boat. The Calais ferry port is the most confusing place on earth. We walked miles around the docks before we found an entrance and, of course, the doors didn't open. So, we sat in the vestibule and froze for five hours waiting for the port to open...
Not my most attractive moment. At 5:30 AM the doors opened and we took the first ferry back to Dover. On the way back, mother nature gave us a treat...
It had been the adventure of a lifetime, and I'm happy to record it here on this blog so that I'll never forget the trials and tribulations of being stranded in Europe with no money and no place to stay. Taken at face value, the trip was a complete disaster. From the botching of the original train ticket times to bringing Simon along to running out of money, almost everything went completely wrong. However, it was the biggest thrill I've ever experienced, and I wouldn't change a single thing about it. Stay tuned, because in a year's time I'll be taking a month long trek across the USA before flying back to Europe. Now that I have experience in the ways of getting around and surviving, the hardship to enjoyment ratio should be a bit more even...

That's all, we shall now return to our regularly scheduled programming..:-)

-Matt

Remembering old stuff is cool...

So I'm sitting around trying to think up blog entry ideas, and I realize that I have a whole folder of grainy pictures from my trip to Ethiopia in March 2007 that are just waiting to be photoshopped. I sat down for a couple of hours and fiddled with the ones that were half decent, and here is the result. Be forewarned, these were taken on crappy disposable cameras and are the infant steps of my photographical journeys [Read: They are shit, don't hurt me]. Here they are, some cool photos all the way from Africa...

Hey! Who's that white guy in the last photo wearing the snazzy white polo? Holy shit, that's ME..!!!?

For those that don't know, I used to look like this...
Now, I look a lot more like this...
I guess this goes to show, a lot of things can change in two years, but some things will forever be the same..:-)

-Matt

And now for something completely different...

I feel like it has been forever since I did a non-Crazy European Adventure blog entry, so I'm going start talking for a while, completely oblivious to my surroundings, then snap back into reality and realize that it's 5:14 AM and I should probably be sleeping. Oh wait, I started this blog entry at 5:14 AM...

Well, then here goes...

I laugh every time some person several years older than me tells me that it sucks to get old because you get tired faster, you get random aches and pains, and eating thirteen chocolate frosted donuts actually causes a physical difference in the shape of your stomach. I know it's completely true. One of these days, my metabolism is going to rebel and I'm going to fall over in a huge heap having wrecked my body for the past few years. I've smoked (in the past), I've done illicit substances that, over time, alter the way my brain and body work, and I never exercise unless you count walking into town to obtain food. I eat..pretty well actually. I cook my own meals and always use fresh market ingredients. Still, I don't have a regular eating schedule. Sometimes I'll eat a huge meal, like, say, four plates at a Chinese buffet, then won't eat anything else for the rest of the day except for a roll and delicious stolen chocolate bars. Candy tastes better when it's stolen...

Right now I'm in pretty decent shape, but I'm completely unhappy with the way I look. I lost tons of weight backpacking and it has yet to come back, no matter how many peanut butter Kit Kats I eat. My arms are THIN, like, concentration camp thin. That's always what I use to describe myself when I haven't spent a summer eating mom's free food and lifting heavy boxes all day at my job. The winter FUCKS ME UP physically. Mentally, too, but we won't go into that. It's pointless to attempt gaining back summer physique now, though, I'll have to wait until I'm back in the states on June 1st...

There's something I can talk about. I have less than a month left in England. ZOMG!!!!1!!one!!1

Can you believe that just three weeks from now, I'll be in New Jersey again. It's weird. This whole experience is going to feel shorter and shorter the further into the future time drifts, until one day I'll only remember a few choice moments and perhaps the first names of the people that I've spent the past three months living with. Fading memories are a scary thing. Luckily, I have this blog to remind me that I've pranced around in Paris, visited Harry Potter sets, and was nearly raped. Wow, now this is turning into a recap "best of" entry. I guess that means I need to start thinking of some new material...

Okay, four paragraphs of rambling should be enough for my reader(s) to endure, I'm off to bed..:-)

-Matt

Crazy European Adventure Part 10: A Series of Unfortunate Circumstances...

It was time to leave Paris, but the days ahead looked grim. There were four nights between the present and the departure of our ferry back to England, and we had no money and no place to stay. Furthermore, the remnants of Simon's food poisoning were very apparent, he looked like a ghost and was still sporadically dry heaving. There was hope, though, because Simon had 220 Euros waiting for him just down the street. I was down to a mere 15 Euros, but those amounts combined should have lasted us the rest of the trip...

We coaxed Simon out of bed and dragged him outside so that we could obtain our funds and have a meal. That was what kept us going, the prospect of a warm meal. As delicious as French baguette is, hot food is much better for the soul. We made it to the bank and, after a bit of waiting, smiled with glee as the teller handed over the crisp 20 Euro bills...

This was our ticket out. With this money, we could afford rooms in cheap hotels for three of the four nights. We found a cheap place just outside of Paris called Formula 1. It was a chain that existed all throughout Europe, so we planned our route to match up with cities that had Formula 1 hotels...

With this financial boost, our budget jumped from 5 Euros a day to 25 Euros a day. We decided to have a nice warm meal at Monmarte, but Simon was still ill and convinced us to try eating in the dodgy town surrounding the hotel. It was a huge mistake...

We walked from place to place, not too happy with our surroundings. The buildings were dilapidated, the streets not taken care of, and the people looked sketchy. We walked into a couple of places, but nobody was serving food. Three old men smoking pipes and sipping coffee would give us odd looks before an owner would tell us to leave. We needed to get back to Paris...

Now, however, we were lost. We wandered aimlessly through the less-than-pleasant streets before finding an open market. This wasn't a regular open market, though, it was an open BLACK market. People were pawning laptops, guns, obviously stolen clothing and shoes, and every step we took was a new offer for drugs. We all clutched our passports and wallets closely as we quickly made our way through to the other side which led to Monmarte. When we finally made it through, Simon said:

"Wow, that market was really sound. I think we should go back later..."

"Simon, just shut up..."

On the path to Monmarte, we found a cafe that was decently priced. A full meal cost around 10 Euros...

"We'll go here. Simon, how much money did you bring..?"

"Money? I didn't bring any money..."

Good. Now we were sitting in a restaurant that served 10 Euro meals and the three of us, combined, had my 15 Euros. We had to order one small pizza between the three of us which tasted amazing but left our stomachs something to desire...

We got back to the hotel and Simon went for a walk. About half an hour later, he came back with two things, a 5 Euro plate of French Fries and 20 Euros worth of hash. Now that I had no money, I was no longer in charge of the funds and this is what happened. Our food expenditures jumped through the roof, and he never bought anything of much nutritional value. Cherry tarts, biscuits, brioche, it all added up to no money at the end and no filling food in our bellies. Flower and I were livid one day when Simon began tossing bits of baguette on the ground! Wasting food! IDIOT!!!

We were almost arrested when we arrived in Lille the next day by plain clothes police officers. They approached us as we got off the train, mostly because we were scruffy and carrying rucksacks...

"[With badges out] We are the French police. Do you mind if we search your bags? We are just making sure you aren't carrying any drugs or dangerous weapons."

"Yeah, sure. Not a problem. [Opens bag]"

[At this point, one of the cops began rummaging in Flower's pack, only to find a wizard's robe, frilly pink pajama pants, and trippy yellow trousers.]

"Do you do any drugs? Do you smoke marijuana?"

"No."

"No."

"I have some hash! [Takes out hash]"

Guess who said that? LUCKILY these cops were cool and the amount of hash we had wasn't enough to be arrested. LUCKILY we aren't in a French prison right now. I just don't have words for how angry I was when we walked away...

Moving on...

We walked into the town center where it rained for a few minutes. I took the opportunity to snap some photos, like always...
That made me feel much better. We headed back to the hotel when we got tired, but I slept little. Now, thanks to Simon, I had a sinus infection. Breathing was difficult, and every ten minute interval required a nose blowing and a coughing fit. The rest of the adventure would be quite a struggle...

Don't worry, next time I'll have a happier entry..:-)

More to come..:-)

-Matt