Compy II is in production...

After the tragic death of Compy, I immediately set out to find a replacement. I ordered Compy II Friday, a Dell laptop customized to my specifications, but it's projected arrival date is August 6th. No computer for three whole weeks. *twitch!*

I know it's sad and pathetic to all of the older people out there, but what do I DO all day to keep my mind occupied? HBoO went home this weekend to play piano for church, and I've never experienced such mental anguish. Sitting in my small room with no computer, access to the internet, friends to hang out with, or a job to go to, I did all the things I could think of to occupy my time. At 10 AM on Saturday, I read Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim by David Sedaris and a good portion of Alice in Wonderland. I played guitar for a while, then took a drive to TCNJ and walked around the campus taking pictures. After that, I ate some sushi, drove home, took a shower, and looked at the clock. Many of the day's hours remained. The library was closed, so I couldn't take out any more books. I lacked the funds to buy anything with entertainment value. The rest of the weekend scarily resembled this...

This Friday, HBoO is leaving for a family vacation. She'll be gone for eight days, and I'll be alone in my house again with no computer. I need suggestions. Anything to occupy my time. Your help is much appreciated and will contribute to preserving my sanity...

Thanks in advance..:-)

-Matt

RIP Compy 2005-2008...

A couple of months ago, the first signs became apparent. Like an unexpected cough on a made-for-TV movie (thanks David Sedaris), the initial appearance of the belligerent BSoD (Blue Screen of Death) meant that it was only a matter of time before I would be saying goodbye to my good friend Compy. As the BSoD became more frequent and basic operations took more and more time, I started planning ahead for the future. I knew the end was near when I hooked Compy up to an external hard drive. It's own had become a diseased, burnt-out shell of an organ...

And, just yesterday, Compy's operating system shut down, never to be uploaded again. RIP Compy, I will miss thee...

Stay tuned for when I get a replacement and can write some more blogs. Until then, a hiatus..:-(

-Matt

The Comcast experience...

Today, I have the internet. Let's say that first. I shouldn't be upset, because I have the one technological development that I could not live without (sad, I know). But HOLY SHIT, what a fucking process...

Two men showed up at my door to install both digital cable and high speed internet. Wait, no. Let me start again. One man showed up at my door, the other was already lounging in the back of the van on a cigarette break. After taking a quick look around the house, the other left to join him. After fiddling with the box outside for fifteen minutes, they entered the house and stood baffled at the crappy wiring job my landlord had done. Finally, they got to work, but, once everything was hooked up, I still had no TV or internet. Instead of contacting somebody who knew what to do, they both decided to call their friends and discuss their plans for the evening (drinking and smoking with homies). Their next order of business was to offer me drugs, to which I suggested they call Comcast directly and ask for assistance with the job at hand. This proved successful in the TV department, but access to the information superhighway (LOL) was still beyond our grasp...

Then, the unexpected happened. The two professional internet technicians decided that connecting me to the internet was beyond their qualifications and left. Yeah. They were gone and I was alone in my house with no internet. Again. Luckily, they had left a copy of my receipt with a previous owner's phone number on it, so I was able to call Comcast and get ahold of a representative who registered my modem and fixed all my problems. Now, I have the internet. Well, sort of...

This is where cable and internet should be...
But this is where the talented Comcast technicians installed it...
This should make my landlord and housemates pretty happy...

...
...

-Matt

Two for one special...

It feels so good to write blog entries, I think I'll do another..:-)

HBoO and I were just sitting in her bedroom, both furiously enjoying our newfound connection to the internet when, suddenly, I got an IM...

"INTANETS!!!!"

"Where??"

"RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!!!"

*turns head*
AAAHHHHHHH INTANETS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...

...

Maybe you had to be there..>_>

-Matt

Time slips away in my absence...

I'm cursed. Every time I find myself in a new location, I have serious issues with obtaining internet access. Some of you may remember an instance where I disappeared from the face of the earth for six crucial days. When I returned home from England, my parents had set up a fancy new encrypted wireless connection. They were pretty pissed when I enlisted the help of HBoO's dad to hack into their system and unlock the internet to the public, but what was I supposed to do? My parents can barely email, they would have called some guy who would charge $500/minute to type in a few IP addresses and check a few boxes. And, here we are, all moved up to my new house near TCNJ, and more shit has accumulated on my proverbial fan. I thought my housing contract provided internet access, but, alas, it did not. It'll be fixed on Sunday, but tons of stuff has happened and, damnit, I need to write about it on the internet..!

HBoO and I went to New York to see our favorite Broadway show, Spring Awakening, and HOLY SHIT SON!!!! It was the best thing I've ever seen. Seriously. My parents bought me tickets for my 21st birthday and, because they obtained them so far in advance, we got front row center. FRONT. ROW. CENTER!!!!

Any Broadway show would be an orgasmic experience in that position, but I got to see Spring Awakening, THE coolest show ever. For those that don't know, it's about a bunch of naive 19th century German teens who discover their own sexuality. Yeah. For the uninitiated, that sounds pretty damn retarded. I was skeptical last year when HBoO made me listen to the soundtrack, but it grew on me really fast and became one of my favorite albums. Seeing it live, however, is an experience beyond belief. No words could possibly do it justice, so do yourself a favor and drop $100 to see it. Right now. Stop reading. This is not a joke..>_>

That's all for now. I have more stuff to say, but this entry is becoming too eclectic. More to come, expect regular entries starting Sunday..:-)

-Matt

The situation...

I moved up to TCNJ on Sunday, and my house lacks internet. I'm at the library right now because I'm HARD x CORE, hopefully I'll get up the courage to call the local internet company and tell them that, if it isn't too much trouble, they should be at my house one day next week between the hours of 8 AM and 6 PM where I'll be waiting diligently and without complaint. *World's largest eye roll*

Expect updates in the unforeseeable future..:-)

-Matt

Heartwarming explosions...

Earlier tonight, I was driving home from HBoO's house when, suddenly, I saw a brilliant white light in the sky. This light was followed immediately by a loud bang, so my initial reaction was one of indescribable woe and anguish...

"Fuck. I'm dead. I died. I'm dead."

Fractions of a second later, the white light in the sky expanded and transformed into dozens of smaller red and green lights branching outward in a circular pattern away from the epicenter. This familiar combination of sound, color, and shape tickled my occipital lobe, telling me that I was not dead, but, instead, witnessing a fireworks display.

"Ooooohhhh!!! Aaaahhhhhh!!!"

I pulled over to the side of the road, now noticing that several other motorists had done the same and watched the tail end of the show, my eyes all lit up like a puppy in a window and my heart skipping a few beats...

I love fireworks..:-D

-Matt

Urban legends come true...

The other day, as I slowly drifted in and out of consciousness while working at the pool store, I heard a very peculiar sound. And by heard a very peculiar sound, I mean smelled an incredibly pungent stench. Who had walked through the glass double doors other than...
SASQUATCH!!!!!!!!!!!!! RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wait a minute...

Why is Sasquatch wearing socks and sandles? I can understand being shirtless, he has enough body hair to keep himself warm in the coldest of winter months, but since when has Sasquatch started dressing like an unfashionable dad, and why is he asking me if we sell Ph Rise..???

Oh wait, it's just your average Piper Pools customer. Nothing to see here folks, let's move along...

-Matt