Saturday, December 15, 2007

Hallucinogenic Drugs and their long term effects...

I want to take a moment and talk about my previous lifestyle and how it still has lingering effects on who I am today...

This picture was taken in November 2005, I was a freshman in college. Notice the unkempt, dirty, frizzy long hair? That means that I used to do a lot of drugs, and I was perfectly willing to broadcast it to the world as a part of my personality. What's going on in this picture, you ask? I am in a near comatose state, blazed out of my mind, and listening to Dark Side of the Moon. At that very moment, about 80% of my freshman floor mates are in my room staring at me being completely oblivious to my surroundings. People were literally waving hands in front of my face for about fifteen minutes before, finally, somebody flicked my nose and I came to. Where did I find this picture? One of my old friend's "25 most ridiculous pictures from freshman year" album on facebook holds this monument to my immaturity. Let's move on...


Here I am, just a few short months later, moving up on the psychedelic ladder. This is a candid shot of my 18 year old self after having melted to the floor. At this point, I'm watching a slew of army men doing a hula dance while I lay sprawled on my friend's floor choking on my own uncontrollable laughter. Yes, I'm tripping on psilocybin mushrooms. Yes, I watched as the shadows cast on the ceiling transformed into Eeyore the donkey performing fellatio on Chicken Boo from Animaniacs. Am I especially proud of this moment? No. Am I going to pretend it didn't happen? No. Am I going to to broadcast it to the world via blog? You bet your ass...



Enter sophomore year.This is the last and most pathetic of my exhibitions. Though this is another shroom picture, I'm going to take a bit of creative liberty and ascertain that this is about what I looked like while tripping on acid. No pictures or video exist to document those events, so my memories of the situations must suffice. Warning: the following descriptions are not for the faint of heart. This is what happens when you trip on acid aka consume three tabs of LSD. First, you wait 45 minutes. Though this time should be spent consuming enough food to last the next 13 hours, it is instead wasted staring at this or something equally bizarre and stupid. Waiting, waiting, waiting. Hmm..what's that strange feeling? Heh..that picture of a flower is swaying in the breeze. Pretty cool. Hey, I know what would be a good idea. Let's smoke weed while we trip (this is actually a REALLY bad idea). Also, some music is necessary. Holy shit, there is a gingerbread man inside of that flower, and he's dancing to the music! Cool! Awesome! Fun times! Check out all of this crazy shit! The paintings are melting, the carpet is a sea of birds fluttering, the ceiling is a huge churning bowl of oatmeal! I feel one with the universe! Yay! So cool! *seven hours later* This is really cool, but I'm tired. My mind hurts. What can I do to feel better. Hey! Let's smoke some more weed (REALLY REALLY REALLY bad idea). Oh, shit! That didn't help. Now everything is crazy again, but I'm tired. When does this end? It feels like years. Hey, what's that? It's me, age 5, riding a big wheel. Now I'm in my old best friend's house. Wow, cool, I'm seeing my childhood. Who is the guy on the cover of that book? (Van Gogh) Now, I'm growing up a bit. Hey, what am I doing here? It's Wednesday, I have class tomorrow. Shouldn't I be trying to find a girlfriend? I'm lonely. Hey, there's my old friend again. Wow, how old am I? 19, holy shit. I'm getting old. What am I doing. I remember everything, I can see everything. Wait, it's happening all over again. I want it to stop. Why won't it stop. It's Wednesday? I have class tomorrow, what am I doing? What time is it? Why won' t time go forward? Am I stuck like this? Oh, fuck! I'm insane! I'm going to be in a mental institution for the rest of my life thinking I'm a glass of orange juice! There I am again, age 5. When is this going to end? Why won't it end!!!?

My third acid trip was a bad trip. The last five hours was the most frightening experience of my life. After a day of deep contemplation, I quit everything. No more weed, no more shrooms, definitely no acid, not even alcohol. It was over...

Here we are, almost a year later. I almost can't believe it's been that long. I have a job, I'm doing better in school, I have better friends, the greatest girlfriend in the world, and life goals and aspirations. To all of the druggies out there, just look how far you can go!

-Matt

5 comments:

meloogal said...

i love you

Laura said...

Wow.
Congratulations.

Mrs. Who said...

Out of curiosity, was college the first time you did drugs? And if so, was/is the college you attend not close to your home?

(I'm about to send kids off to college, and I want to know how much to freak out!)

Congratulations on stopping.

BurningSky said...

College was not the first time I tried drugs. I started smoking marijuana the summer before my senior year of high school on an infrequent basis...

My college is an hour from my house, but I live on campus.

Don't be too worried about your kids leaving the nest. Sure, there will be temptation, but college is nowhere near what the movies depict. Contrary to popular belief, not all college students are like John Belushi, in fact, the vast majority are not. I'm sure you kids will find their niche and be transformed into academically and socially mature adults.

-Matt

Anonymous said...

is your brothers name robert ewing--- making a wild guess he used to be a senior at my high school last year and he sorta looks like you