Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The big day...

Everybody goes through this. Weeks and weeks of doing absolutely no physical activity, then, one day, it hits you...

"Ugh! I'm fucking disgusting..."

Now, I don't have the usual body afflictions. I'm skinny, so my laziness doesn't yield saddle bag thighs or cankles. It does, however, make me look like a horrible heap of skin and bone with absolutely no form whatsoever. Couple this with an extended period without shaving, and you have one unhappy person. Did I mention the smell? I have no air conditioning in August, do the math...

Suddenly obtaining a new computer with a processor and video card capable of playing Civilization IV, Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, and Rome: Total War means I've been sitting on my lazy ass for the last couple of weeks eating Cheez-its and screaming at a series of zeros and ones. My shower called, it was lonely...

Every year, at about this time, I get the urge to start exercising. I always pick something that I'm bad at in hopes of improving myself.Two years ago, I ran laps around my campus in lieu of all the smoking. Last year, I biked several miles each morning before work because I never really rode my bike when I was a kid. This year, perhaps after being inspired by Michael Phelps, I decided to start swimming. I'm a terrible swimmer. I can float for about five minutes before my body decides that drowning is a better option than surviving. A couple of years ago, I almost died in the ocean when a riptide pulled me out to sea. Yeah, swimming is the logical choice...

Today was the big day. After putting it off for weeks, I wanted to get in the pool and start bulking up for winter so that I can get SAD and watch myself wither away. I put my bathing suit on, got in my car, and drove to campus. With my school ID in hand, I approached the door to Packer Hall and gripped the door handle. Then, I looked up...

"PACKER HALL WILL BE CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE FOR ROOF REPAIRS! SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE!"

I guess I'm destined to be a hairy, smelly sack of skin and bones. Sorry, HBoO..:-/

-Matt

1 comment:

Suldog said...

Yeah, but you seem like a nice hairy, smelly sack of skin and bones.